Then Comes Baby in a Baby Carriage

The other day I was caught really off guard by a question a woman I was talking to asked me. I can't remember exactly how we started our conversation (I believe we were talking about sports, I'm not really sure), but I do remember that I told her I was never interested in many because of the very likely possibility of overworking myself and overheating because not all of my sweat glands work. Naturally, this lead to her asking why and to me responding, "I have Incontinentia Pigmenti." Once I explained what that meant a bit more, she asked me how one gets such a thing, to which I responded it is an x linked genetic disorder and it is thought that my mom is a carrier. That's when the really surprising question came, the one that kind of shushed me into shock. What does that mean as far as you having children goes?


I'll be honest, I've never really thought about it a whole lot because I don't want to. The genetic disorder I have, it can be pretty lethal in males, so the few times I have thought about the possibility of having children in the future, I've tried to push the idea out of my head. I mean, why should I even be thinking of having children in the first place? I'm only nineteen and me having children is not going to be happening anytime soon. But that still doesn't change the fact that  when I do settle down eventually, the idea of passing on my genes scares the pants off me. Just because I have a mild case doesn't mean they would necessarily have the same luck, and if I do have a boy, what kind of risk would I be putting him at simply by conceiving him? What if having children of my own was too much of a risk for them? Would I be okay with adoption or with an egg donor? Would my husband? How would I feel about not having a child that is not biologically mine? All of these questions from a single inquiry from a woman who was practically a stranger.


In all seriousness though, this is a major concern of mine, as I'm sure it is for many women out there, as well as men. For those whom having a family is very important, the possibility of passing on one's own genes can be terrifying. No one wants to believe that they imparted undesirable qualities on their loved ones, especially their own children. When the day comes that I'm ready to settle down with someone I love and start a family, I hope that I am strong enough to face whatever comes my way, but until I'm older and know more about my own genes and how they might effect others, I just have to focus on keeping myself healthy.